Typo

IF ENGLISH WERE A PHONETIC LANGUAGE MY LIFE WOULD BE ALMOST PERFECT.   IF I COULD WRITE ENGLISH THE WAY I HEAR IT, IT WOULD BE SO MUCH EASIER.  SPANISH, MY FIRST LANGUAGE IS COMPLETELY PHONETIC.  TO ME IT FEELS LIKE ENGLISH HAS SO MANY RULES, AND THEN SO MANY EXCEPTIONS TO THOSE RULES!  WHY DO YOU SPELL PHILADELPHIA THE WAY YOU DO?  IT SHOULD BE SPELLED F-I-L-E-D-E-L-F-E-I-A. OR IF YOU WANT TO MAKE “FAMILY” PLURAL YOU HAVE TO DROP THE “Y” AND ADD THE “IES”… WHY NOT “EES”?  IF I SEND YOU A TEXT WITH A KISS, I WRITE “MUA!” BUT MY AUTOTEXT WILL CORRECT AND WRITE “MUAH.”  I JUST DON’T LIKE THAT, I JUST LIKE IT MORE IN SPANISH. IT’S LIKE YOUR LIPS PUCKER JUST LIKE A KISS AND IT’S LONG MMUUUAAAA WHAT’S UP WITH ALL THOSE DIFFERENT SOUNDS FOR ONE LETTER?  A “C” CAN SOUND LIKE AN “S” OR A “K.” I ALSO HAVE EXTREMELY HARD TIME WITH THE “O” THAT SOUNDS LIKE A “U.”  NOT JUST ONLY THE SPELLING IS DIFFICULT BUT PREPOSITIONS TOO! FOR EXAMPLE, THE ALARM IS GOING OFF!” WHY DON’T YOU SAY THE ALARM IS “ON”?

BUT DON’T LET ME FOOL YOU THAT SPANISH IS A CINCH.  WE HAVE THE “B” AND THE “V” THAT SOUND EXACTLY THE SAME; THE “S”, “C” AND THE “Z” THAT YOU CANNOT TELL THE DIFFERENCE EITHER. THE DOUBLE “LL” AND THE “Y” SOUND EXACTLY THE SAME AS WELL. AND HOW DO YOU LIKE THE DOUBLE “RR”, ALL OF THE ACCENTS, AND THE IRREGULAR VERBS.  BUT AT LEAST IT’S A PHOENITIC LANGUAGE!  WE WRITE THE WAY WE SPEAK, AND SPEAK THE WAY WE WRITE.

ENGLISH HAS SOME ADVANTAGES DESPITE IT’S DIFFICULT WRITING RULES, IT IS A MORE SUCCINCT LANGUAGE FOR INSTANCE.  YOU CAN GET TO THE POINT IN ENGLISH QUICKER (MAYBE THIS IS CULTURAL!).  IF YOU WANT TO BREAK UP WITH SOMEBODY YOU JUST NEED TWO WORDS, “IT’S OVER!”  IN SPANISH HOWEVER, THE WORDS BECOME MUCH MORE ROMANTIC AND APOLOGETIC. I MUST SAY THAT FOR BUSINESS ENGLISH IS A MUCH MORE PRACTICAL AND DIRECT LANGUAGE.  YOU CAN JUST SAY” LET’S MAKE MORE MONEY!” IN SPANISH IT’S MUCH MORE ORNATE AND ROUND ABOUT, AND HARD TO PIN DOWN!

SPANISH IS COMPLICATED I GUESS NOW THAT I THINK ABOUT IT.  YOU CAN HAVE SUCH SUBTLE DIFFERENCES IS MEANING BETWEEN COUNTRIES, STATES, AND EVEN IN FAMILIES.   I HAVE SPENT A GOOD PART OF MY LIFE SURROUNDED BY SOUTH AMERICAN PEOPLE, AND BECAUSE I DID IT AT A YOUNG AGE IT HAD A MAJOR INFLUENCE IN THE WAY I EXPRESS MYSELF IN SPANISH. IF YOU WANTED TO SPEAK TO ME IN SPANISH, MY VOCABULARY AND MY ACCENT IS NOT TOTALLY TRUE TO MY ORIGIN, IT REFLECTS THE SOUTH AMERICAN INFLUENCES IN MY LIFE. NO SOY DE AQUI NI SOY DE ALLA. I’M NOT FROM HERE, NOR FROM THERE. (LIKE THE LYRICS OF THE ARGENTINEAN SINGER FACUNDO CABRAL)

I AM JUST HOPELESS; TO SPEAK TO ME IN ENGLISH OR SPANISH YOU NEED SOMEBODY ELSE TO TRANSLATE FOR ME.

MY INFAMOUS JUST FOR KICKS, TAKES SEVERAL PEOPLE TO HELP ME BEFORE WE ARRIVE AT THE FINAL VERSION.  WHILE I CAN DO FAIRLY WELL COMMUNICATING VERBALLY, IT’S VERY FRUSTRATING FOR ME TO WRITE. I NEED TO BE ACTIVE AS I THINK ABOUT WHAT TO WRITE, SO I DICTATE TO MY VERY EFFICIENT AND SAVVY ASSISTANT.  AS I PACE AROUND THE STORE, TALK TO CUSTOMERS, GIVE DIRECTIONS TO THE GIRLS, FIX DISPLAYS, ANSWER THE PHONE, SIGN CHECKS, MAKE IMPORTANT DECISIONS, AND NOT SO IMPORTANT ONES, AND GOSSIP, SHE JOTS DOWN WHAT I’M WANTING TO SAY!  (LUCKILY SHE MAJORED IN SPANISH!) I HAVE NEVER BEEN TESTED BUT I’M CONVINCED I HAVE ADD, WHICH IS A GOOD AND A BAD THING… OR RATHER, IT’S FINE FOR ME BUT MIGHT FRUSTRATE OTHERS!  WHILE I DICTATE TO HER, I LAUGH A LOT, SOMETIMES CRY, BUT MOSTLY I DRINK A LOT OF LATTES! (I LIKE A SINGLE DECAF GRANDE NON-FAT NO-FOAM LATTE BTW)

AFTER THIS PROCESS, MAGIC HAS TO BE DONE BY A FAMILY MEMBER WHO KNOWS ME EVEN BETTER THAN MYSELF.  SHE KNOWS ME SO WELL IT LITERALLY SCARES THE “S**T” OUT OF ME.  THEN MY SON TAKES CARE OF THE GRAPHIC DETAILS.  IT’S A PROCESS, AND STILL, EVEN WITH ALL THESE EYES READING, AND EDITING WE CAN STILL HAVE TYPOS. IF ENGLIGH WAS JUST A PHOENTIC LANGUAGE!! MY LIFE COULD BE ALMOST PERFECT.

AS ALWAYS, I LOVE TO HEAR WHAT YOU THINK! YOU CAN E-MAIL ME AT ME PERSONAL E-MAIL GUADALUPEGOLER@HOTMAIL.COM

P.S. DO YOU KNOW MY BIRTHDAY IS COMING UP? LOL. THURSDAY 8/20 STOP BY THE STORE FROM 12-4 FOR A SLICE OF BIRTHDAY CAKE AND TO WISH ME A HAPPY BIRTHDAY! IF YOU COME IN AND SING ME THE THE MEXICAN LAS MAÑANITAS I WILL HAVE A GIFT FOR YOU (UNTIL THEY RUN OUT!)!